This is a post that I’ve wanted to write for a long time, for the last couple of years at least. Before that I didn’t suffer with anxiety. Apart from the odd worry over an exam or interview I considered myself quite a laid back and chilled out person.
I guess my journey with anxiety started when I became a parent. Suddenly I had something to worry about that actually meant something. I had a little life to look after and my whole world completely changed. I went from being a carefree young lady, just out of university, working in my dream job to being stuck at home, sleep deprived with a colicky baby to look after. I didn’t go out much or socialise and my world got a whole lot smaller.
That’s exactly how anxiety got me, it gradually made my world smaller and smaller until I felt like I couldn’t breathe anymore.
Fast forward a few years and I had my second daughter and I suffered from a nasty bout of vertigo. This vertigo, although quite short-lived was to change my life completely. It triggered a driving anxiety so severe that at the start of the year I was panicking about driving to the next village. I couldn’t drive on motorways or anywhere I hadn’t been before and I was basically trapped in the town I live in.
This anxiety over driving then seeped into other parts of my life and I eventually found myself feeling anxious over nothing at all. At the end of last year I’d find myself sitting at my desk with this horrible sinking feeling in my stomach and a huge pressure on my chest and such a horrible anxious feeling. The problem was that I didn’t even know what I was anxious about. The feeling could last for days and then be gone all of a sudden.
I’ll be honest, at this point it all got too much for me.
The anxiety was making my day to day life hell, I’d describe it like a vine, it would start off small and then start to snake it’s way around my body, constricting my heart.
I decided that enough was enough and I went to see my GP. He was absolutely wonderful I must say and prescribed me beta blockers to help with the physical anxiety symptoms and recommended a course of CBT. Luckily my husband has amazing medical insurance through work with BUPA and I was able to see a therapist through that.
Today, 6 months on I am doing so much better. The day to day anxiety has gone and I’m well on my way to tackling the driving anxiety. I no longer take the beta blockers and I’m determined not to let anxiety beat me.
I thought I’d share my journey of anxiety with you, because it can happen to anyone. I have a happy, wonderful life and this still affected me. There was no real ‘trigger’ moment, just lots of little things that added together to create a more anxious me. I know that so many of you also suffer with anxiety so please don’t suffer alone, reach out, chat to others, message me (I’m always online) and let’s beat it together.
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