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    How to Balancing Parenting and Supporting Aging Parents

    Dec 10, 2023 · Modified: Jun 12, 2024 by Ali · Leave a Comment

    Your senior parents and children are very likely the people you most cherish in the world. However, as they're your relatives, they also fall under your care, which can be a cause of great stress and anxiety.

    To compound that challenge, your work life, social life, health, and other obligations also hang in the balance of your time management skills. If you fall behind in any one aspect, it could lead to undesirable consequences.

    You could find yourself drowning in obligations and sacrificing your time in favour of your family, which is commendable but unsustainable.

    The key is to strike a balance between all your obligations. And with the right strategies and techniques, you are very much capable of pulling it off.

    Without further ado, here are six tips to help you parent your child and support your ageing parents, all while fulfilling your other obligations.

    senior couple holding a gift box and bouquet of flowers
    Photo by Ivan Samkov on Pexels.com

    Rehome Your Parents

    Moving your parents out of their current living arrangement is a major decision. However, it is often the best action to take for their well-being. This is especially true if you decide to move them to a Living Choice retirement village. 

    Not only do your parents become less reliant on you for housing and food, but they'll also be close to amenities, social halls, and medical services-granting you peace of mind that they're well-supported.

    In the case of residential aged care and home care services, you may be able to receive subsidies from your local government. This means that you might not have to pay too much out of pocket should your parents be eligible for these grants. 

    But even if you have to pay a sizeable amount, the knowledge that your parents are cared for by professionals in a retirement community is a priceless feeling.

    Spend Quality Time with Them

    Even outside of caretaking, it's still really important to just have some quality time with them. Why not do some activities they enjoy? Maybe this is going out to the park, going out shopping, seeing a movie, but this could even be something more relaxing such as just sitting at home on the couch and doing mentally stimulating activities such as a game of sudoku. But you need to help them with their cognitive health so it's important to do actitvities that are stimulating. 

    Communicate With Both Parties

    If your boundaries are getting pushed, it's important to recognise the fact that you're not a slave to the whims of your family's every command. This is especially the case for your older children and your parents.

    As such, be proactive in communicating your boundaries and challenges with your family members. Have honest, gentle, and age-appropriate discussions with your children about the dynamic you're currently in and how you want to adjust it. 

    Similarly, talk to your parents about the challenges you're facing as you're caring for them. When communicating with them, be sure to approach the discussion in a gentle and empathetic manner. Don't be exclusive and domineering, be inclusive and open to hearing their side.

    By fostering open communication channels, you can get your family to recognise your challenges, which may compel them to make adjustments to their lifestyle to accommodate you. This would ease your stress and lead to more harmonious interactions in the future. 

    Use Caregiving Services

    If bringing your senior-aged parent to a retirement home is not the right option, an alternative is to enlist the help of home care services.

    Many in-home carers have the expertise and resources to take care of your elderly parents' needs. Due to their specialised skill set, they also know how to treat or recognise conditions that need immediate care, making them invaluable in promoting your parents' health.

    Besides that, their assistance also gives you additional time freedom, enabling you to achieve a more healthy work-life balance. A common setup is for them to work during the day when you're away at the office.

    Just like retirement homes, you maybe be able to request government funding to get a subsidised rate for residential aged care and home care services. If you're in a financial pinch, be sure to take advantage of these grants to lessen your bills each month.

    Delegate Chores to Your Child

    Children can learn to take care of certain tasks. In fact, this is a great learning opportunity for them.

    Of course, you'd want them to take on tasks that are appropriate for their age. For instance, if your child is toddler-aged, you can teach them simple chores like putting away toys and clothes and wiping cabinets and tables.

    For pre-school-aged children, you can teach them to set and clear the table, water plants, and put food in the pet bowl.

    Once your child can perform these chores, living with both them and your parents becomes a much easier endeavour to handle.

    Make Time For Sleep

    While you may have normalised running on less than six hours of rest a night, the fact of the matter is that sleep is an essential human activity. This is especially true if you're constantly under stress from your daily life.

    Sleep doesn't only help keep you well-rested, it also helps your cognitive and emotional well-being stay in working order. Constantly lacking sleep can take a toll on your body, exposing you to health risks.

    If you're constantly in a state of sleeplessness, your overall efficiency will dwindle, which can affect how you care for your parents and children. To ensure that you're well-rested, you must set your environment to be as comfortable as possible. 

    To start, you can consider installing A/C units and black-out curtains in your room to keep it cool and dark. You should also check your bad habits, such as nightly TikTok scrolling, and minimise them as much as possible.

    By changing your routine, you can feel more energised and ready to care for others.

    Get a More Flexible Job

    Is your job constantly forcing you to work overtime or over 10-hour shifts? Is commuting to and from your office stealing precious hours of your day?

    If aged-care services aren't an option, it's in your best interest to perhaps seek alternative jobs that allow you to stay close to family. 

    A good start would be to take jobs that can be done remotely. These jobs come with the benefits of a full-time job without the added hassle of commuting to an office. 

    Alternatively, you can also consider going the self-employed route and setting up your own business, which gives you more flexibility on how and when you want to work.

    That said, be sure that you can uphold your set to your clients. Once you strike the ideal work-life balance, you can be financially safe and able to fulfil the needs of your older relatives and children.

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    About Ali

    Hi I'm Ali, a vegan mummy of four from Wales in the UK. I love reading, cooking, writing, interiors and photography, all of which I share on here. I also make videos on my YouTube channel. Come and follow us and share our journey.

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