It’s the school holidays. You can’t face going abroad with the kids so you book yourselves onto a ‘cheap’ caravan holiday a short drive away. Far enough away that you feel like you are on holiday but close enough so that you can drive there quickly.
Invariably you will pick somewhere about two hours away, thinking that you can make the drive with no stops. You are wrong. Despite making the kids go to the toilet eight times before you leave, despite putting on the in car DVD players and packing a cool bag of snacks you will find yourselves stopping at a service station where you will push your way through the throngs of grumpy travellers, avail yourselves of the grotty public conveniences, shouting at the kids not to touch anything or wander off while you are in the loo.
You will then of course be nagged into buying some overpriced sugary sweets in the shop, where they only sell giant bags of such sweets. Your kids of course cannot agree on a sweet they like so you are forced to buy two massive bags even though you know it will mean you have to endure sugar laden arguments for the rest of the journey. On the way out you spot the coffee stand. Ah – a nice coffee will make it all better. But it won’t. You will pay twice the price for your usual latte, wait half an hour for the understaffed makeshift coffee shop to produce your drink, it will taste grim and you will leave it on top of the car while you belt the kids back in and drive off without even finishing it.
Oh, and of course as soon as you are back on the motorway you will hear that little voice…Mummy I need the toilet. AGGGGHHHHH!!!